A successful marriage is one where both parties work hand in hand to bring the best out of each other, not one lifting and the other pulling down.
Success in marriage may mean that you and your spouse are on the same page when it comes to values and belief systems while it may not be so for others.
Companionship, commitment, starting a family amongst others are the reasons for going into marriage and to achieve this reasons, there are essential pillars needed to build a happy and successful marriage.
- Love: Love is patient, kind, does not envy, does not boast, is not proud, is not rude, is not self seeking, is not easily angered, keeps no record of wrongs, does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth, always protects, trusts, hopes and perseveres. Love is not merely a feeling, it is a deep unity that is maintained by will and deliberately strengthened by habit.
- Trust: A good marriage cannot be sustained when there is no trust. Spouses trusting each other is vital to the success of the marriage. There are levels of trust in a marriage. (i) Fidelity: Spouses must be able to trust each other that they will both be faithful in the marriage. (ii) Honesty: A spouse should be honest about who they are, their feeling or thoughts and about their successes and failures. They should in no way hide anything from each other. (iii)Behavior: Spouses should be able to trust each other’s behavior and reaction in certain circumstances such that when a third party says otherwise of their partner’s behavior, they should be able to defend their partner’s behavior and don’t give in to third part interference.
- Mutual Respect: The way spouses treat each other shows how much value they place on each other. Without mutual respect, partners in marriage will feel devalued. This devaluation erodes mutual respect and causes coldness towards one another.
- Understanding: Understanding one’s spouse is important in order to ensure that one will be able to show respect, communicate effectively and be able to attend to your partner’s needs.
- Faith: It is the understanding that there is something larger than one’s self. Spouses who have faith in God and hold before them the standards of marriage as God intends will find the journey of marriage to be most fulfilling of all earthly relationships.
These and more are the essential pillars needed in building a successful and lasting marriage according to God’s standard.
Is your marriage going through any kind of turbulence at the moment, ask God to still the storms and give you the strength and grace needed to build a successful marriage,
